7.27.2008

myths on dating // the preface

I know, I know...if there's anything I'd rather NOT write about in the world, it would be on this subject matter. My employment at a Christian bookstore for a couple of years helped me develop a slight distaste towards literature on Christian dating philosophies. You get to a point where you realize they're all saying the same thing. Don't get me wrong--these books serve a purpose. But they can all be summarized with two words: date (or court...if you've chosen to use that word instead--and on that note, can someone really explain to me the difference?) wisely. 

That's why I hesitate to start this series of posts. In my opinion, it is much more beneficial to teach a biblical view on gender identity than it is to teach a biblical view on dating. Why? Because the latter really doesn't exist--most people just write from their past experiences. I'd much rather see us spend our time discussing God's instruction for true manhood and womanhood. I think most of our frequently debated topics on dating would be a lot clearer if we did so.

Therefore, these posts aren't solely limited to the context of dating. It's just the context I see the myths in the most (which isn't uncommon when you are in your 20s). But I'm going to attempt to examine them on the basis of having a correct view of God's purpose in gender. 

Now, before I go any further, I should also point out the fact that I am single. And although I've learned a few lessons from my own relationships, all of them have obviously ended for various reasons, which leaves me with very little credibility to write on the issue. Therefore, if you feel as though this is adequate means for dismissing everything I have to say on this subject matter for fear that I may screw up this area of your life, I will not hold it against you if you choose to read no further. :)

Let me introduce you to what you can expect in the coming days. The following "myths"--better described as an incorrect way of viewing these types of relationships--are phrases that I hear all too often...and at one time, may have even come out of my mouth:

1. "It's going to take a great man to earn my respect."
2. "You complete me."
3. "We're just friends..."
4. ummm...I have yet to think of a title for this one. So you'll be surprised. 
5. "I'm ready to get married."

And I really don't want someone to explain to me the difference between dating and courting. The above statement was made in sarcasm. Just in case there's anyone that's really passionate about the issue...

3 comments:

Chris said...

The difference between dating and courting? Easy. Courting is way lamer than dating. If you're lame, you court.

I wonder how well sarcasm goes on the comments section of a blog? I guess we'll find out by examining how many people hate me for typing this.

Anonymous said...

I am excited about what you are going to say about this topic... I agree with you that almost all "christian dating books" say the same thing and that the thing people really need to be learning and moving forward on is their own relationshp with Christ and becoming the man/woman he wants us to be.

devin

Renee Lewis said...

i'm also excited to read the rest of this!